Best Known For: The shrill, but perplexingly attractive wife of human-sized sandwich receptacle Kevin James on King of Queens.

Why You Wouldn't Expect Her To Be a Scientologist: Having watched King of Queens, we're more than a little surprised that they actually wanted her. You can almost picture her at some Scientologist retreat, nagging away at John Travolta for fucking up his tone scale.

That said, she’s earned her Hubbard stripes, having been a vocal supporter of Scientology in the past. Remini gave the Church of Scientology a loving, 40-minute tongue-bath when she appeared on Janeane Garafolo’s short-lived Air America show Majority Report to plug some manner of Scientology-endorsed “detoxification cure" nonsense. More surprising: that airwaves could handle that much brittle, sarcastic estrogen occupying the same space and not implode like a black hole.

Connections: According to Remini, she was the first person to have seen Suri Cruise in person, even though she’s never been known to be on even "nodding acquaintance" terms with Tom or Katie. She did not comment about whether Tom Cruise has since eaten the baby.

Presumed Operatng Thetan Level: Three or Four (is able to regulate her "meat body" for thetans, and can rid self of the "effects of drugs on the spirit")