1. KERRY'S JOKE

2. PLAME LAWSUIT

3. FOLEYGATE

4. ZIDANE

5. BON APPETIT

6. ISLAMIC CARTOON

7. BROKEBACK MT.

8. WIRETAP

9. AIRLINE SECURITY

10. CLEANUP

Source: TIME

10. Voltron: Defender of the Universe - The 80s’ other shape-changing robot. Six young pilots control 5 robot lions. Click them all together and they became… well, you get it. This was an early Japanese import like Power Rangers (which came soon after). Supposedly (and don’t be shocked) the anime version was much more violent.

9. Bravestarr - On the planet of New Texas… one of their idiots is missing. No, sorry. This one was about Marshal BraveStarr who used his super powers (Strength of the Bear, Speed of the Puma, Eyes of the Hawk, Ears of the Wolf) to preserve order and justice from the evil Tex-Hex, leader of the Carrion Bunch.

8. Jem - This one was based on (wait for it!) A TOY! It was also for the girls which, if Hollywood were interested, could be a good thing. Except it would be based on Jem and her band the Holograms. Jem was actually the alter-ego of Jerrica Benton who became Jem thanks to an uber-computer/synthesizer/beat machine called Synergy. Why? To win the Battle of the Bands. Duh! Oh, and to save Starlight House, a home for foster girls.

7. Monchichis - Another toy with a grating, yet catchy song. Also from Japan. These monkey things lived in the land of Monchia where there tribal wizard Wizzar (oh, the creativity!) helped battle the evil Grumplins. Give me the Smurfs any day.

6. Strawberry Shortcake - Actually this one didn’t start as a toy but a greeting card fad and sticker craze. Strawberry and her other dessert themed friends (like Huckleberry Pie and Apricot) lived a happy life. Their nemesis was the Peculiar Purple Pie Man who, I assumed, wanted to make jam of the sweet tykes. Strawberry Shortcake is already experiencing a comeback, so don’t be shocked if this one becomes movie reality.

5. Pac-Man - Video game sensation! Pac didn’t really have a plot until Saturday morning cast him as the hero of Pac-land (complete with eyes, hat and a family) outwitting “ghost-monsters” (Inky, Blinky, Pinky, etc.) as they tried to steal power pellets for Vader clone, Mezmeron. Yes, even in the 80s, Hollywood could make a show out of anything.

4. She-Ra, Princess of Power - Think He-Man for girls. If Wonder Woman fails to make it to the multiplex… let’s hope they skip this one about Princess Adora who, as She-Ra fights to free Etheria from Hordak and his evil Horde. Her twin brother is He-Man so maybe Dolph Lundgren needs some work.

3. The Smurfs - They’re small, blue, and have squeaky voices. They also have only one woman for the lot of them. These elf/gnome/whatever the heck they are beings lived among mushrooms and elude the evil Gargamel who always wanted to destroy the fun loving blue guys (and gal). The Smurfs were originally a Belgian creation so they have a much longer pedigree than their cartoon implies. Warner Brothers is already on this property. Smurftastic! (Oh, I wish I hadn’t said that)

2. Thundarr The Barbarian - You’d think if Hollywood was hard up for a barbarian, they’d call on Conan. As a back up, though, this He-Man clone has some appeal. Not for me, you understand, but for somebody. Thundarr roamed a future, post apocalyptic world battling the wizards that took over the joint. He’d see ruins of recognizable Earth structures like New York and Mt. Rushmore (makes you want to cast Charlton Heston and some damn dirty apes!). Along with Princess Ariel and Ookla The Mok, Thundarr took on some Star Wars elements as well. Maybe this could be a good flick after all.

1. Captain Caveman - This is my personal vote for the big screen treatment. Do it live action. No CG for Cavey. Big action set pieces. Hot babes for his Teen Angels. Captain Caveman solved mysteries a’la Scooby Doo (no big shock since he came from the repeating minds of Hanna-Barbera). He did have super powers (super-strength and the ability to hide useful objects inside his fur) and a super club that allowed him to fly. I see blockbuster franchise!!

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